Brett's Two-Cents

A friend and former parishioner sent me a collection of “ageing” jokes this week. Hmm. Now, why would he send THOSE to ME?!? (Quiet, Fr. Hans!) Anyway, they WERE kind of humorous, so I thought you might enjoy them too!
 

Three sisters, ages 92, 94, and 96, live in a house together. One night, the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, 'Was I getting in or out of the bath?’ The 94-year-old yells back, 'I don't know. I'll come up and see.' She starts up the stairs and pauses, saying, 'Was I going up the stairs or down?’ The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table
having tea listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, 'I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood...' She then yells, 'I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door!'

 
 

Three retirees, each with hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, 'Windy, isn't it?' 'No,' the second man replied, 'it's Thursday'. And the third man chimed in, 'So am I. Let's have a beer.'   

 
 

Two elderly gentlemen had been friends for many decades, sharing all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, they just met a few times a week to play cards. One such day, one man looked at the other and said, 'Now don't get mad at me, I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is!’ His friend just stared and stared at him for several minutes. Finally, he said, 'How soon do you need to know?'