Brett&#039;s Two Cents

February 8, 2020

Hello, everyone. Some more deep thoughts, courtesy of a friend who wishes to remain anonymous. . .

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
If buttered toast always lands buttered side down, and cats always land on their feet, what would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast to the back of a cat?
Why isn’t phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
How does the guy who drives the snow plow get to work?
You know how most packages say “open here”? What should you do if the package says “open somewhere else”?
Why is it that when you transport something by car it’s called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship it’s called cargo?
You know that little indestructible black box that’s used on airplanes? Why can’t they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Why is it that when you’re driving and looking for an address, you turn the radio down?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Why is the time with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
And finally (and I think we all know the answer to this one): If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?